Desire...What does it mean to you?
Webster defines desire as the feeling of wanting something.
For me, it's much more than that. The other day Brian asked me when the last time I felt desirable was? Six months ago I would have said, "uhh....never." But these days, "I feel desirable almost everyday."
Rewind to February 2015. I had lots of questions about my life. Is this the best it's gonna be?? The "fun" years were over and I turned 30. I gained a lot of weight and thought I would just continue to gain more weight as I got older. Brian and I were both working so much that we never made time for each other. Keira was going to be four in a few months and to me that was the end of having her as my baby...and I knew I wouldn't be having any more kids once she turned four, I didn't want that many years between her and a new baby. So these past few months were really difficult for me. But just like everything I do, I got out of bed, put a smile on, and just got through it one day at a time.
Fast forward to today...and I feel better than ever!!! Brian and I have made changes in our health and have dedicated family time. Keira is four now and I'm ok with her being my ONLY child. I've learned to love my body, flaws and all. Our business is growing and we are helping so many other women see themselves as beautiful, sexy and desirable. On top of all of that, I couldn't have asked for a more loving husband who tells me everyday that I am the sexiest woman alive.
It's funny how a few small changes can change your whole life and how powerful boudoir can be. Being able to see myself on camera the way everyone else sees me has been such an empowering feeling. Being the "model" of Sheer has given me a new confidence in myself that I didn't know was possible. Being a mom who works full time on top of trying to build our own boudoir business, I know how hard it is to look/feel "pretty" everyday. I also know that you ladies don't get to see yourself through the eyes of the camera and when your man tells you how beautiful you look, I know you brush it off and roll your eyes. I know, because less than 6 months ago I did the same exact thing and still do on days that I'm not all dolled up.
Desire to me isn't just about the feeling of wanting something. It's being able to see yourself as a beautiful person. It's about being confident with the body you have even when your not "perfect". We all have so called flaws. I have stretch marks, cellulite, the mom tummy, etc...and 6 months ago those things were all I saw in the mirror. Now that I feel desirable, I see my gorgeous blue eyes, my freckles, my curves and my amazing personality. Desire isn't about wanting something...it's about accepting who you are and being confident in yourself while letting everything else fall into place.
XOXO,
Jen
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